Tuesday, February 11, 2014

My Personal Egypt

Well, in that last blog, which took a while to get through with the explanation of the Egypt metaphor, I mentioned we need to share our Egypt. I have told bits and pieces of it before to explain who I am (because definitely your past makes you who you are today). So I hardly ever post two blogs at the same time, here is my personal Egypt. I share this not out of guilt, but more shame. In fact, it may not be appropriate for kids under 13... that kind of PG-13 rating at the beginning. But I want to share this because I want this to be my biggest weapon against Satan, so he won't use it as a tool to hold me back in the past (as I stated in the previous blog).

Some of you know that I am a 50-something single male. And years ago, there was the movie, "40 Year Old Virgin". I was that, even to this day. Technically.

But when I was in my mid-twenties, I was doing okay. I met a cute girl at church, who I was serving in the Junior High ministry with. I liked her. And I thought she liked me. We went out a couple of times. I thought she would be "the one". But, little did I know, she was dating her BOSS! And they eventually got married. She didn't even have to change her name! I mean, she married a guy with the same last name! And those that have heard this story, that's when I said "two Wongs don't make it right"!

I could easily blame her and the other guy for that terrible chapter in my life! Something that I was an innocent party to. Often, that could be a part of your Egypt story: someone dumped you, cheated on you, abused you, or simply left you.

It devastated me to the point I didn't even date anybody after that for TEN years! Yeah, the prime of my life, wasted because I didn't want to feel rejection like I had.

But then there's more to the story. The part that gets... ashamed. Even as a Christian, I did it.

Well, working in health care, I have to deal with naked bodies. And I handle myself professionally when working with patients. But, I easily got into pornography. All I had to do is see a beautiful woman on the cover of a Playboy, and that was it. I was hooked. I love beautiful women! After all, they are God's creation! Right?

The problem was I was worshipping God's creation over God, the Creator! I was lusting over these beautiful women! And to make it even more disgusting, I got into the sex toys and the blow-up sex dolls. It was my way of dealing with the pain of dealing with a real woman!

Even in those Clinton years, Chief Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders said masturbation was a good way to avoid sexually transmitted diseases! And this was when AIDS and HIV was coming out. It seemed like the safer route of dealing with these issues than dealing with a real woman!

But in my heart of hearts, I felt the shame. the guilt. The pain. The loneliness. It wasn't right. But being the insecure introverted nerd I was, that was my reality!

So, that's my personal Egypt. Out in the open. On the Internet, no less.

But now I have nothing to hide! God has forgiven me of my past and now that I have unloaded the guilt baggage off of me, I am set free!

God is love. He always was. And He still is! If you need that kind of love and forgiveness, come to Him now in prayer: "Holy Father God, forgive me for I am a sinner. Please take my past and make me new, through the precious blood of Jesus Christ, who died on the Cross for ALL of my sins. Please cleanse me of my unrighteousness in my past. Make my future renewed in Your Almighty Love and Grace. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen!"

If you just prayed that prayer, you are now a Child of God! You are forgiven and free from your past. Lay it ALL down at the feet of Jesus!

Blessings,
Garret

Freedom From Your Egypt

We all have a past, whether we all like it or not. And oftentimes our past can either help us grow or hinder our growth in whatever form, shape, species or size it comes in. The American Christian Church is good at explaining forgiveness from your sins comes from Jesus dying on the cross. But often we are left behind having knowledge of being forgiven, but not fully freed from our past.

This weekend at church, one of our favorite guest speakers, Chris Brown spoke on Genesis 42. Well, he recapped the story of "Joey" who could interpret dreams. And one day he told his eleven older brothers about this dream where they would reign over them. That didn't fare well with the older brothers, so they were planning to kill him. Well, the other plan was to sell him into slavery, but cover up the deed by faking his death to their father, Jacob. You've probably heard the story of his multicolored coat, which was given to Joe because he was the father's favorite son from his favorite wife. They tore up his multicolored coat and put blood of a goat all over it, making it look like Joe was killed by a wild beast.

In Egypt, Joey had his own set of problems. The Pharaoh's second-hand man's wife has the hots for this young Jewish boy. Joey refuses, but because of her position, she accuses him of rape and is thrown in prison. His dream interpreting helps him get out of his mess as he could tell Pharaoh that there would be seven years of a bumper crop and seven years of famine by a drought. This put Joey in the second in command position over Egypt because no one else had a plan to prosper Egypt through these times.

Okay, meanwhile back in the land of Canaan, where Jacob and his other sons lived, the drought struck also. So when Jacob heard there were grain in Egypt, he told his sons to go down. Uh oh.

22 years of a lie to be exposed? The brothers knew what they had done. They couldn't tell dad the truth now?! Could they?

"Why do you just keep on looking at each other?" Jacob demanded. "Go down to Egypt and buy some grain for us, so that we may live and not die!"

So ten of the brothers went down there, but Benji stayed behind back at the ranch.

In Egypt, Joseph knew who they were when they arrived. But because he was in charge of the land of Egypt, and he was dressed in his Egyptian garb, and speaking through an interpreter, they didn't recognize him. Ha! Just like Joe's dream when he was only seventeen.

Joseph knew what they had done to him, but he wasn't sure if they had done to Benji what they did to him, he wanted proof he was indeed alive. So he sent nine of them back to get Benji with the surplus grain. He threw Simeon in the prison he once lived in as collateral. He wanted to make sure his brothers weren't lying again.

What? Going back to father Jacob with one less brother? Jacob was a mess when he heard Joey his favorite son was dead. Now he'll think they killed Simeon, too? This lie just keeps on getting more complicated!

They were racked with guilt, blaming each other (like Reuben did) and blaming themselves for the mess they were in. Would father allow Benji to come to Egypt?

As they were emptying their sacks, there was in each brother's sack, his pouch of silver used to buy the grain. You would think they'd be thrilled, right? But instead they were frightened.

"You have deprived me of my children. Joseph is no more and Simeon is no more, and now you want to take Benjamin? Everything is against me!" exclaimed Jacob.

Really?

See what lies and deceit does? How about a cover-up of something you've done that you're not proud of? Something you don't want other people to know about you?

Offer it up to Jesus. Quit lugging around all that guilt, shame and pain. Lay it at the feet of Jesus.

Oh, but I've been forgiven of my sin, right?

If you accepted Jesus in your heart as Lord and Savior, your sins are no more. Clean slate.

But as humans, we carry along the guilt, blame others, blame ourselves. And what happened two years ago, 22 years ago... still has you imprisoned in Egypt. If you want freedom from the load of your past, give it ALL to Him. Confess it, share it, and make it a weapon against Satan, not a tool to privately destroy your own life.

Yes, the tool that Satan uses to hold you back in the past could be God's best weapon to overcoming your past. Tell people about your Egypt, and Satan won't ever hold it over you like He has in the past.

Blessings,
Garret